#103: Interview With Lori

103. Interview With Lori

Dara: Hello everybody. So this podcast is very exciting because I have Lori on with me. It’s really awesome to be able to share her story and you can hear from her. She is just incredible. And so, Lori, please introduce yourself and share with everyone how we met and how long we’ve been working together. 

Lori: Hi, my name is Lori. I’m a, a quilter, and that’s how I met Dara. I met her at a quilting conference and she was teaching some machine quilting classes and I was very interested in the machine quilting classes and I found her to be very magnetic and energetic and I just loved her personality and I kind of fangirled her. I just couldn’t seem to get enough of her teaching cause of the way she taught and how comfortable she was able to make me feel. And then, so I started following her on Instagram and she was offering a weight loss course and I thought, why not? I wanna lose some weight and let’s give this a whirl and see how it goes. And so I enrolled in the program and have been continuing to work with her on it.

Dara: Yeah, Lori was pretty much my, one of my very, very first clients. It’s so fun to watch her. So that was in, we met September of 2019 and then she’s been learning the tools and working with me and just making such a difference. So would you be able to share when I talked about weight loss, what was resonating with you about that in particular? 

Lori: I think in regards to weight loss, it was just at that point in time, I tried everything else and it was just like, what do I have to lose? Mm. Let’s see if, if she’s got a different approach than anybody else. And I learned very quickly that she did have a very different approach than anybody else, and an approach that was very welcoming and very easy to follow. And she gave a lot of great suggestions, and I think maybe the biggest thing that she was able to put me at ease and feel comfortable with her and within the group. And I liked the way she presented the information. 

Dara: Yeah. So what did it mean to you to start taking ownership of what you ate? What would the number on the scale and then you actually had to be the person that had to think about it. You had to evaluate yourself. What was that like for you? 

Lori: It was tough at first because I had a real diet mentality and it was just like, no, I need somebody to tell me what to do, when to do it, how to do it, and as I worked through things I found it easier and easier to take more responsibility for myself, my actions, and to set up an eating plan that works for me and that I feel comfortable with. And now it’s pretty well habit to drink my water, get my sleep, eat the foods that I eat, weigh myself, and follow the steps in the program. 

Dara: Yeah, it’s interesting. I’ll never forget, you sent me a message one time and you said, I’m standing in the middle of my kitchen and I really want to eat this thing but I know I’m, I’m not supposed to, but I don’t really know what else to do. Because that was your coping strategy. And I remember thinking, she’s starting to get it. She’s taking that pause, she’s taking that time to actually start thinking about why she’s putting that food in her mouth. And that was a huge shift for you, and I’ll never, never forget how powerful that was in your life.

Lori: Yes. Yeah. And I’ve continued to work along that. And I’ve realized that I’m not a victim of my circumstances, that I can control my thoughts and my feelings about what’s going on in my world. And I find myself right now being even more peaceful and calm about my everyday life. I can process my emotions. I don’t retreat into myself anymore like I used to. And I’m, I’m getting better and better at processing those emotions and just letting them go rather than bottling them all up and then either exploding, reacting, resisting, or avoiding them all together by eating foods. 

Dara: Yeah. Yeah. So what impact has that had on the relationships around you? That you’re processing emotions, you’re using these tools, you’re thinking about your thinking? 

Lori: Well at work it’s had a huge impact because Ive been just, okay, well that’s just what they’re thinking. That’s what they’re doing. I can’t control them. I’m, I’m just gonna be at peace with it and I’m not gonna let them kind of spoil my day or make me annoyed or upset, or go and eat. As far as the relationship with my husband and my family, it’s a lot more open and caring. I’m way less judgmental about them and what they should or shouldn’t be doing. It’s okay. That’s what they’re doing. That’s the way they wanna be then that’s fine. They can be like that. 

Dara: Yeah. And you live in a pretty small town and you’ve got your kids that live close by. You’ve got your parents, you’ve got siblings, like you got lots of family stuff going on. 

Lori: Yes. Yeah. And when you mentioned that, that was another huge shift was the relationship with my daughter-in-law and my son and the two grandkids that live in town, because there was a time when my daughter-in-law wanted, when the grandkids were born, she wanted nothing to do with me. And now they come over quite regularly and I’m kind of their first go-to person and we see them every Sunday and have developed a really great relationship with them. 

Dara: Yeah, that’s such a better quality of life, right? And just that confidence that comes of knowing you can have difficult conversations, you can change that. So as far as your productivity, because we’re all well most people listen to this podcast are quilters or creatives of some sort, and we value having time in being creative. What has happened there for you? 

Lori: Quilting has always been a stress reliever for me. And I was kind of using it as a crutch. As a buffer. Let’s go quilt instead of feel my emotions. But now when I quilt, I process my emotions just like, okay, I think about things and I process my emotions. I’ve become way more confident as a quilter. I remember when there was a time when somebody would give me a compliment about a quilt or winning a ribbon or something, and I’d be just, thanks. But that quilt has this mistake and this mistake and this mistake in it, and I just don’t do that anymore. Like when I won the ribbons on the weekend, it was just like, thanks. I did a lot of hard work on that. I’m glad you appreciate it and I gained the confidence in quilting that I feel that I can not only quilt for myself now, but I feel confident enough now that I’ve started a long arm quilting business and have people kind of almost lined up my door wanting me to quilt their quilts for them.

Dara: Yeah. And the reason you were able to do that shift was because like what were the biggest shifts for you, like the tools that helped you to make that change?

Lori: I think the biggest shift was shifting from just doing the thought downloads, working on the models, realizing that I’m not a victim, that I can control my thoughts and feelings, I think was the biggest thing. Just being able to process the emotions and think about my thinking.

Dara: Yeah. Sometimes when we talk about tools or words might sound confusing, but essentially what happens is you become a human being versus a human doing. I think so many of us were just like, go, go, go, trying to do everything for everyone else, and then we become like reactionary and it feels like we didn’t really have a choice and we’re kind of giving up our power. We’re worried about judgment, all of that. Whereas now we can really take a look at what we’re doing and we can be like an active participant in our own life. So that’s where we don’t have to feel like a victim anymore. So what have been your biggest takeaway so far as you work through Love Yourself Thin and and you keep working through all these tools? 

Lori: I think my biggest takeaway is that I’m a lot stronger than I thought I was. That I don’t need to be weak and shrink away. And I think maybe the biggest thing that kinda comes to my mind is I don’t have to expect others to change in order for me to be happier. I just accept the things that I can’t change rather than I want somebody else to change. I’m getting done way more things than I used to get done. I’m not free with food. Of course, I’ve lost some weight, so that’s good. And I’m congratulating and encouraging myself more. I find myself talking to myself. I’m like, wait a go girl. Look at you do this, or look at you do that. And, and I’m more accepting of others as well, that they’re just doing the best that they can. I’m doing the best I can. 

Dara: Yeah. Yeah. How much weight have you lost so far? 

Lori: I lost 45 pounds. 

Dara: 45 pounds. And how does that feel when you realize you’ve taken that weight off and you’ve kept it off for three years? So when you think about not carrying that extra 45 pounds around on your body, how has that impacted your life?

Lori: I think the biggest impact it had on my life was that I was able to move and run and move more freely, I think would be the best way to put it. 

Dara: How has that changed your confidence?

Lori: I don’t know if losing the weight is what really changed my confidence or just all of the thought work. But yeah, I guess it has changed my confidence because I’m not scared to put myself out there. 

Dara: Yeah, but I think you’re right. Because I mean, there’s still more weight you wanna lose eventually, but like, it’s no big deal like, but I think the way you think about yourself now, I’m accomplished. I can do hard things, I can work through any problem. Those are the things that give you the confidence of being able to move forward, like putting in five quilts in a quilt show, actually having a long arm and offering people to help them, right? Like cuz weight loss, that’s actually like a circumstance. It’s a fact. Like 45 pounds is neutral. It’s not until what you decide to think about it is what will impact you. 

Lori: Yeah. Yeah. So a lot of the work I have been doing is not necessarily on weight loss, but on changing my mindset and being more confident and being more of my authentic self and putting myself out there and realizing that I don’t have to change to suit other people around me, that I can be myself. Yeah. Yeah. That’s a confidence thing. It really is.

Dara: That’s awesome. What are you the most proud of?

Lori: What am I most proud of? I think I’m most proud of all of the mental changes that I have made. I’m proud of the way that I’m able to express myself with others and not worry about them, judging what I’m saying. Not sugarcoating what I’m saying or anything like that. I think I’m proud of the fact that I have enough courage to be able to start a long arm business and do that sort of thing, and proud of the relationships that I built with people in the program and the people in my family and outside the program as well.

Dara: Yeah. Yeah. So if you were to give any advice to people who are listening to this program and they’re thinking, oh, it sounds too good to be true, or they’re thinking I just don’t know if I’m smart enough, or, I don’t think I could have enough time to do this, or I’m too much of a failure. Whatever doubts we all carry around, right? We all do. What advice would you give them about joining Love Yourself Thin? 

Lori: I was gonna say run to the program. You’ll be amazed at how much it can change your life. Cuz I’m amazed always at how much it has changed my life. For practical life advice, what do you have to lose? Like if you’ve tried everything else? I would certainly say give Dara a try. I mean, she’s got a money back guarantee. So there’s always that. The group is very supportive.

Dara: Yeah. It’s a safe place. Yeah. But what about the ladies that are listening to this podcast who don’t have a lot of physical weight to lose? What would you say to them?

Lori: I would say to them that they will definitely benefit from it because I think that’s where most of my benefit has come from, is from working on my thinking and working on my people pleasing and my perfectionism and I’ve done a lot of work and overcome a lot of things in that area. And that’s definitely something that’s more than the weight loss. 

Dara: Yeah. So I have a question about the lifetime membership, knowing that, you know, we’re gonna be around for a long time. So some people might feel like this is a big commitment and they don’t wanna, I mean, a lot of us, we are good students, right? We wanna be able to be like the best student. We wanna come to all the classes and the modules and everything. But that does feel really overwhelming. So what would you say to them about that?

Lori: Well, what I like about the program and it be in a lifetime, is that you can just kind of work at your own pace through everything. You can come to the calls or you can listen to the calls, so you can kind of work on it on your own time if you need to or want to, rather than making sure that you’re committed all of the time. I’ve really shifted away from that good student mentality to just kind of working at it at my own pace and accepting that, yeah, I can do this and I can do this and let’s work on this today. And I tend to set aside like 15, 20 minutes every day first thing in the morning to get things straight. And then in the evening I’ll listen to a podcast or go through a few modules and maybe invest another hour. So when you think about it, if you’re scrolling or playing a game on Facebook, you can easily listen to a module rather than do those activities.

Dara: Yeah, Yeah. And you know, Lori still works at her job part-time, so she can’t always come to all the calls. And has that impacted you or has it been okay?

Lori: Oh, it’s been fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, there’s really been no impact because everything is recorded and so I can just go back in and listen to it and, and do the work on my own. And then if I have a question or something pops up, I can always post it in the group or post it and ask a coach and get answers.

Dara: Yeah, it’s so fun. So thank you, Lori. This has been really fun to talk to you. This is so fun to hear these things. And so I just wanna encourage all of you, if the things that I’m saying, the things that we’re saying in this conversation, if they’re resonating with you, if they’re landing and you’re peaked with your curiosity and you’re feeling fear, that means you’re ready. And so you can either join, like Lori said, run and just join, or you can book a call with me. You can have a conversation. What’s it like having a conversation? Because you’ve had to make some decisions. You’ve come to my retreats, what’s it like to get that support from me one-on-one? 

Lori: It’s awesome. Like yeah, you’re right. I’ve gone through some really traumatic, that I thought were traumatic things and the first person I’d reach out to is, is you and say, Hey, I need some help with this. And you’re always willing to pop in and help. I’ve always benefited whenever you’ve coached me on different things. So it was very easy for me to, to make the decision to join the program and to continue to come back to the program or go to the retreats because I always learn so much. 

Dara: Yeah. Well, I always say your brain is your best investment. Yeah, and you have invested. You’ve invested in me. You’ve invested time and money. You come to my retreats and one was in Wisconsin, one’s gonna be here in Vancouver, so you had to travel. You even like drove from Saskatchewan, ladies to Wisconsin. It was amazing. How has that been for you to invest money in yourself, so when you think about the money you spent and the time you spent, why do you do it over and over? 

Lori: Well, I do it over and over because I learn so much. I always learn, grow, change. You’ve always got some really great advice. And like at the retreat, there was things that you covered there that I never would’ve learned or figured out about myself if I hadn’t invested money to go to the retreat. Yeah. 

Dara: Well, and I think that was the key, what you said was, you learned, but you changed and that’s what happens in Love Yourself Thin. You like, there’s one thing about just gaining information, and that’s one of the problems with listening to a podcast or watching a YouTube. It’s like you’re consuming information, but not until you actually get, you know, even thinking about quilting, you can watch all sorts of people teaching about quilting, but unless you actually start doodling or taking fabric to a machine, right? And start quilting it. Doing that action, you won’t make the change. And it’s the same thing with our brain. And people can listen to this podcast or any podcast and think, oh yeah, that makes sense. But unless you actually start applying it and getting the help and the correction to tweak it and to help you, then you can’t make true change. I mean, I have learned tons of things on podcasts. I’ve created a lot. But when I actually invested in the program, I was floored at the change that happened, so thank you, Lori. This has been so fun. 

Lori: You’re welcome. 

Dara: All right. Well, thank you so much and everyone, I think you should just follow her advice. Run, and join Love Yourself Thin.