

What You’ll Learn from this Episode:
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You can change your relationship with food
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Your worth is set
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Getting to the root of the problem is a big part of figuring out weight loss
- Weight loss requires time and money investment
Listen to the Full Episode:
Featured on the Show:
- If you are ready to lose weight and change the way you think, sign up for the lifetime access membership for Love Yourself Thin! Doors are open and you can find all the information by clicking here.
- Leave me a review in Apple
Full Episode Transcript:

102. Interview With Stephanie
Dara: Are you curious of what it’s like for the first four months of Love Yourself Thin? Well, I have a special treat for you. Today is an interview with Stephanie who has had incredible successes with Love Yourself Thin, and you get to really hear the heart of a woman who is brave, who is able to conquer her struggle with food since she was three years old, and I can’t wait for you to hear this interview. I felt so much love as I interviewed her. I am Dara Tomasson, and this is Love Yourself Thin episode 1 0 2. Interview with Stephanie.
Hello everybody. I am so excited to introduce Stephanie to my podcast. She is a fairly new member of Love Yourself Thin, and it’s really fun to listen to all of her thoughts. She’s had so much progress. She’s made so many incredible shifts, and so I thought it’d be really valuable. For you to hear from a member of love yourself then who is fairly new and her reaction to everything that she’s learning. So welcome. Stephanie, would you like to introduce yourself?
Stephanie: My name is Stephanie. I’m a 52 year old homemaker in California. And I enjoy all things crafty. I love to quilt and cross-stitch and knit and crochet. My newest adventure will be teddy bear making. So yeah, I just enjoy all those kinds of things.
Dara: Well, awesome. All right, so the question is how did you find out about me and why did you decide to invest in Love Yourself Thin?
Stephanie: I first came across Dara about a year and a half ago. She was on a podcast or a YouTube video with Lisa Bongean of primitive gatherings, and I just kind of thought, oh, this is interesting. I went on to Dara’s website last year and followed kind of her, you know, three weeks without flour and sugar. And my husband and I kind of did that together. And it really, it seemed to work for us, you know, to kind of cut out the carbs. It was very difficult at first. But we did it and we kind of kept up with. You know, that habit. And then as many times in the past, I kind of fell off the bandwagon and, you know, started eating whatever I wanted again. And you know, I’m a lifelong person that struggles with their weight. And the end of last year, the end of 2022, I kind of got to the point where I felt like I had run out of options. I thought weight loss surgery was going to be in my future. I had doctors that had recommended it to me and I thought, well, I guess that’s what I have to do. I was always very hesitant to go down that path because I knew I hadn’t done everything that I could, I knew that if I really put my mind to it, I could lose the weight. It wasn’t that I my body wasn’t able to lose weight. I just wasn’t doing the work that needed to be put into it.
So I had mentioned it to my husband one night and he said, before you start thinking about that, what about that one lady that we tried, the no sugar and no flour. He goes, that seemed to really work. Why don’t you you know, go back and check on that. So over the next couple days, and I went several times to Dara’s website and there’s the opportunity to meet online with Dara. So I sent her a message and arranged a, a time to zoom and she just asked me a lot of questions. It was very friendly, very open, and I felt very comfortable and she just kind of said, you know, I think there’s some work that we can do together and asked, you know, if, that’s something that I was interested in, she’d be happy to have me join. And so I got the prices for just doing Love Yourself Thin, and then also doing one-on-one coaching. And I’ll have to admit, I’m like, that’s a lot of money. I thought I know I could swing the, the Love Yourself Thin cost, but I wasn’t sure about the one-on-one coaching, but I really felt that in order to really get down to some serious business. I needed that one-on-one, you know, where somebody like knew the thoughts that were going through my mind. You know, it wasn’t, you know, like just generalize. I was really getting focused on things. So I did talk to my husband. And he goes, if you think that this is what it’s gonna take, then he said, it’s worth it. And he goes, we can do it. So I let Dara know, and that’s kind of how I started my journey.
Dara: Yeah. So tell us where you’ve started out and where are you right now? And I think our first coaching call was what? The second week of January?
Stephanie: Yeah, I think it was like, first week of January, like at the fourth or something like that. Mm-hmm. I started at 323 pounds and now I’m four months into it and I am down 57 pounds. So now I’m at 265 and yeah, it’s been a process, you know, struggle at first, you know, to really give up the flour and sugar. Because sugar was my worst enemy and my best friend all at the same time.
Dara: So very unhealthy relationship.
Stephanie: That’s right. So yeah, that’s the process. And I don’t feel, in past, I’ve done several other weight loss programs. And always, by the time seemed to be able to lose 50 pounds, no problem. But once I got to that 50 pounds, I’d start getting a little lax and saying, oh, you know, you’re doing good you can have a treat, and it seemed like then the weight just would creep back on plus a little bit extra. So,
Dara: Yeah. And what has happened with your relationship with treats?
Stephanie: Treats are no longer the solution, or what I thought was the solution, they’re no longer there to mask the underlying problems because I really learned, you know, in the first couple modules when we talk about the science of food that I have all I need you know, to get by with not a ton of food at this point, I’ve got a lot of extra calories that need to be burned and treats were no longer going to be the answer to emotional problems because that’s truly what the issue was. It’s not so much food. Food is important, but it’s food is fuel and it’s not a reward.
Dara: Yeah. I want you to share about your first joy eat, because, so for six weeks you didn’t have any flour and sugar. And then what did you do for your joy? Because I don’t want every, I don’t want people to believe that they can’t, like, sugar is not the enemy. Flour’s not an enemy. We just don’t have it very often. That’s all.
Stephanie: Right. So my joy eat, I thought initially when I was gonna get to the joy eats, I’d go straight to desserts, you know, to be able to have a dessert. But in working through things, I realized desserts, yeah, they tasted good, but I was never satisfied, wasn’t providing satisfaction. And what I said I really wanted was a good burger. And luckily for me, a new craft burger place opened a couple miles away from the house. And so I planned to go you know, that I knew at the end of the week we were gonna go out to dinner and I already, I looked on the menu online and I saw what I wanted to get. And I had that burger and it tasted really good, but I also like, was very conscious of how I felt after it, you know, not to overeat. So I, it’s probably been six weeks that I’ve been able to have a joy eat every week, and I only need the half a hamburger. That’s satisfying enough to me. And I did learn, you know, Dara said, you know, if you’re hungry, you know, you can have the whole hamburger. So I have a hamper and some out of this world tater tots.
Dara: I love it. All right, so when you think about what are some of the biggest shifts that you have in your thinking about your yourself, your body, your food, day to day?
Stephanie: So I think some of the shifts have been in my role of food. Like I said before that food always was something to reward myself. It was a treat and I, I kind of lived to eat and I lived to eat both in public and in secret. Big secret eater. And I’ve learned that the food is no longer, you know, what I thought it was, and my shift now is on my, you know, my emotional wellbeing and health.
Dara: I love it. So how has this impacted your relationships with your husband, your kids, your community?
Stephanie: They’re probably happy to see me happier, but I think my relationship with myself, I love myself so much more than I did before because I’m doing things to make myself a better person and to be able to focus, not spend so much head space and time on, you know, the problems of myself, but trying to make myself better and be the best wife that I can be, and be the best mom that I can be, or to be the best daughter to my mom or be the best friend to my friends.
Dara: Yeah. And you’re not beating yourself up about it. It’s just more like playful and fun.
Stephanie: Yes.
Dara: I love that. What are you most proud of?
Stephanie: I think I’m most proud of the fact that I’m showing up for myself. I’m doing this not to be a certain size or to be a certain weight, but to be a better person.
Dara: And what do you mean by that? Like a better person? Because like our value is already there. Like you don’t have to be more worthy or, so, but what does that mean to be a better person for yourself?
Stephanie: I’m putting myself first.
Dara: What impact has that had?
Stephanie: Well, by putting myself first, everything else seems to fall in place, you know, taking care of myself allows me to take care of my husband and to take care of my kids and not feel that I’m inadequate in some way. Yes, my worth has always been there, but I didn’t believe the worth. Now I’m believing the worth.
Dara: Yeah. Yeah. That’s so beautiful. And so when you think about putting yourself first and doing the mind work, I think some people might listen and think, wow, that’s a lot of effort. Like, that’s a lot of hours a week. And, but when you think about you know, you’ve had the opportunity to be with me one-on-one and then you’ve had the group, but what has surprised you about doing the work? Has it been tons of hours or like, what has that been for you?
Stephanie: I wouldn’t say that it’s been tons of hours where, you know, I’m just sitting there looking at the modules and doing, you know, homework or whatever you might wanna call it. But it is a lot of time because my mind is thinking about these things all the time. You know, I don’t wanna say analyzing, but in a sense, analyzing, okay. I’m feeling the urge that I want to eat something. Well, why is that? Are you hungry? You know, it’s going through all of the different things that we learn and ask. It’s kind of like you’re questioning yourself. And really trying to understand what you’re feeling.
Dara: Yeah. Well, it’s also anytime you learn a new skill, you’re going to have to have that. But the thing that’s interesting for me is how much time did you spend thinking about food before this program?
Stephanie: Oh, a ton. You know, it was like always, when am I gonna go to the store to get some more candy or oh, there’s a nine by 13 pan of bars. Oh, I could just have another one. Oh, or another one. Yeah. It was very all consuming.
Dara: So when you think about the last, you know, almost four months of learning this process how many more things are more automatic to you than they were at the beginning of like, ways of thinking, different behaviors, different habits. Like do you ever go to the store and buy candy anymore?
Stephanie: I do not buy candy anymore. I’m not even tempted to buy it. You know, I think it’s become automatic to me of what I was, what I realized, what I was doing before, you know, and getting the candy. I was trying to satisfy something that couldn’t be satisfied with food. So now it’s much more automatic for me to, okay, why is this temptation going on? Or why do I want this? You know, what’s the real reason behind it?
Dara: Love that so much. So you’re finally getting to the root of the problem. You’re actually getting satisfaction. You are truly solving the actual problems, and you’re not just spinning around. That’s so beautiful, Stephanie. So when you think about the investment that you made both monetarily and the time do you have any regrets?
Stephanie: I have no regrets. I can’t imagine my life without this program. Without the knowledge I’ve learned. It’s so much more than a weight loss program. It’s not a weight loss program. It’s, it’s about loving yourself. And like many people, you know that struggle with weight. I didn’t love myself and I don’t think I could go back to living the way I was before even if I like stopped doing all the activities and joining group meetings, I think what I know and what I’ve learned, I don’t think I’d be able to go back how I was when I started.
Dara: Yeah, because how long have you struggled with your weight?
Stephanie: Oh, I would say two, three. I mean, maybe I wasn’t consciously aware of it, but things were going around on around me at home. People would say different things and
Dara: They compared you to your sister.
Stephanie: Yep. Yeah. So you know, it started at a very early age. So that’s, you know, 50, 50 years of struggling with weight and thinking it was all my fault.
Dara: And so it’s interesting how much more peace you feel in your life. I’ve just watched that just over and over again.
Stephanie: Yep. Yeah. So last November my sister was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. And she was 56 and they laid a treatment plan out for her because she was, in pretty good shape and was, you know, healthy aside from the cancer. So she went through aggressive chemotherapy. I spent a lot of time with her. We live about an hour and a half away from each other, but I’d go down once a week and stay a couple days. And unfortunately, after about half of the chemo treatments, she started losing energy and strength. And she ended up passing away a month ago, after four and a half months of, of being diagnosed with cancer.
So, you know, I can’t express the amount of thanks I have for Dara because, you know, you’d think, okay, I’m meeting with her one-on-one. And it’s more than weight loss, but it’s a lot of focus on the reasons why we overeat. And we talked about so much more than that. And you know, really was able to experience emotions that a year ago I would’ve been probably eating even more candy than I was normally eating to deal with the emotions of losing my sister. And it’s like good therapy. Therapy to spend that one-on-one time. And then also in the group meetings to be able to share things you know, in such a, a caring environment.
Dara: And throughout this whole experience, what has it been like for you to have had something so tragic happen but yet not turn to the food? Does that, does that surprise you?
Stephanie: Yes. I mean, I, it’s hard to believe that food didn’t play a healing part in all of this.
Dara: Yeah. Oh, thank you so much for sharing that. I know that it was, it’s been very tender, but it’s also been really incredible to have watched you to truly know where satisfaction comes from and being able to give food its place and then giving emotions their place and giving love and acceptance. And the other thing that we’ve been working a lot on is what do you have control over? What kind of daughter do you wanna be? What kind of aunt do you want to be? What kind of wife? What kind of sister-in-law do you wanna be? And the more that we were able to explore that, the more power you had. And then the food didn’t have any power at all, cuz it wasn’t necessary.
So Stephanie, thank you so much for coming on this podcast and sharing. You’re so willing to be so vulnerable, and I just, it’s been an incredible honor to be your coach and to watch you progress. And so people who are listening to this and that’s resonating with them, Stephanie said it wasn’t, it was actually, what did you say? It was friendly and helpful to come and talk to me on one of these talks. I know it’s super, it’s super scary and it’s also really hard to, we all know that it’s not about food, and we all know that it takes courage and I, in fact, I always call you guys my brave hearts because it’s a lot of work to do this, but the alternative is it’s so much worse to not have a solution. So I’m so grateful that you not only to you, but to your husband and your kids, and your future grandchildren, and all of the people around you because you are really becoming yourself. Yeah. So awesome.
Stephanie: Thank you.
Dara: All right. Take care everyone.


